Just to keep you in the picture -
Had the old lug'oles (or rug'ores) syringed yesterday (yes, a Sunday) at the NCP's, sorry, the NHS's Walk-In-Get-Carried-Out-On-a-Stretcher Centre, which, incidentally, is soon to move to new premises, presumably because too many patients found out where they were.
Well, when I say I had them syringed, I mean I had them a bit syringed, and the upshot was that I was stone deaf when I came out and had to watch Kingdom with subtitles switched on, and it was still the same when I woke up this morning.
Luckily, a modicum of hearing had returned by early afternoon, when a very nice lady from Lancashire Trading Standards phoned to say that they would very much like to act on my behalf in re oneself v. computerwebsnore, an online non-retailer of whom I might have written previously and who owe me £117.56 or thereabouts - a sum which, if rendered in appropriately sized banknotes, would cover the playing area at Wembley Stadium, or, if rendered in very large coin, Wales.
To be on the safe side, I am thinking of applying for a correspondence course in signing, so that I can understand what people wave at me, and I am also thinking of applying for citizenship in a country with a rather better health service than ours, and politicians who are rather less grasping of the incidental expenses of power (Zimbabwe springs to mind), and crooks who just pick your pocket instead of pretending to be part of the Wonderful World of Retailing by Electrons.
Meanwhile, back in the real, sane, rational world...
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