Trailers in books

"I say, Jeeves. Look at this!"

"Sir?"

"In this bally book I'm reading, Jeeves. Curve the spine, lower the optics, and take a hook of the proverbial butcher."

"Yes, Sir. It appears to be Page 1 of a novelette, Sir, or so I infer from the presence of the numeral 1 at the bottom of the page."

"Yes, but dash it, Jeeves. I've just read the bally book, and pretty spiffing it was too, but there's a bit of another book here, yet the publishers, no doubt on the advice of their attorneys or their accountants, have only given the first chapter."

"Indeed Sir. If I might elucidate?"

"Pray do, old chap. If there's one thing about you, Jeeves, it's the old grey matter. Never been known to fail, what? My ear is at your disposal. Out with it, then. Agog is what I am all, not to mention at the bit champing."

"You are too kind, Sir. It would appear that your eye has stumbled across what is known in the lower echelons of the publishing trade as a Tizer."

"A what, Jeeves. What's orange pop got to do with this stuff at the end of my book? Elucidate on, there's a good chap."

"A Tizer, Sir. A regrettable contraction of the noun 'appetiser', or possibly 'enticer' - scholars are divided upon the precise derivation. If I might put it in plain words - fearing that its readers might desert to more reputable houses, the publisher in question has adopted a device more commonly encountered in the Television; the, ahem, Trailer."

"Well, dash it all, Jeeves, I mean to say. I bet that chap you're always on about, that Shakespeare chappie, didn't blot the last page of Romeo and Juliet and then think 'I'll just bung in a chunk of Julius Caesar for good measure.' I mean, when all's said and done, when is a book not a book? Who said that, Jeeves?"

"I believe that you are the first to put it in that particular nutshell, Sir. Rem, as I have so frequently had course to remark, acu tetigisti. And if I might say so, you have turned a phrase that verges upon the sublimely epigrammatic."

"Gosh. Well, if you say so, Jeeves. Sublimely epigrammatic, what? Must write that down. Meanwhile, my faithful old retainer, what do you think I should do with this book?

"It is hardly for me to say, Sir, but Cook has been complaining that the kitchen fire has been proving recalcitrant in the ignition phase of late. If you would allow me, Sir...?"

"What, burn it? Burn a book, Jeeves? Never thought I'd hear those words from your learned fish and chips."

"But as you so neatly put it, Sir, When is a book not a book? This object, I venture to suggest, is, without argument, a non-book, and as such it has no place upon the Wooster shelves."

"You win, Jeeves. Daresay you're right, as usual. Here you are then. Take it away and do with it what you will."

"Indeed Sir. And thank you Sir. Generations of future bibliophiles will undoubtedly be indebted to you, as will Cook."

"Bibbly-what? Oh never mind. Right then, toddle off and do the dastardly deed. Oh, and Jeeves..."

"Sir?"

"About that hat. The one with the purple feathers. You might as well take that to Cook, as well."

"A very wise decision, Sir, if I might say so."

"You might, Jeeves. You jolly well might, at that."